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24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">WPC-B:</td><td>Station control, this is Courier Vessel B with Well Polished Couriers LLC. That ship was my rendezvous. What am I supposed to tell my owners now?</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">THESPACEGUY:</td><td>woot! Explosion!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">AA_fan:</td><td>Score one for the royal navy!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">.xXx.flyboi.xXx.:</td><td>Man, whoever owned that ship is going to be piiiiiiiiiiiiissed.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>I've heard enough.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">G2217:</td><td>This vessel is property of Oxide Cargo Co. Any damage to this vessel or its cargo will result in legal action.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>Your owners are going to sue His Majesty's royal navy? Over a matter of saving an entire station full of people from one AI spaceship?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">G2217:</td><td>You will be held liable for any damages you may cause to this ship.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>G2217, this is the Captain of the destroyer HMS Verdant. If you can't reduce your speed I will be forced to destroy your vessel.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>G2217, you are on a direct collision course with this station. Reduce speed immediately.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">.xXx.flyboi.xXx.:</td><td>Hey, that cargo ship is gonna hit the station!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">THESPACEGUY:</td><td>oh fuck oh fuck oooooohhh fuck</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">awesomthrottle:</td><td>Im still refueling I cant move away!</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">G2217:</td><td>Station control, I am experiencing a total failure of maneuvering thrusters. I am unable to reduce speed.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>G2217, this is station control. You are approaching at an unsafe velocity. Advise you vector away from the station to avoid collision.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">G2217:</td><td>Station control, this is cargo vessel G2217. Have experienced engine malfunction, having trouble reducing speed. Please advise.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Control:</td><td>Station Control to unidentified vessel. Request you reduce speed and identify self immediately.</td></tr></table>

24/04/15
"Daisy -> Flashback! When did you 'wake up' and become self-aware? Who was your previous owner?"

Story time? Sure.

24/04/15
"Maybe you should have asked for a patch job too, what with the whole open conduit thing."

I'm okay with having a weak point exposed. I'm sure I have several. Plus, if the bad guys' weapons are powerful enough, everything is a weak point.

Usually I just try to avoid getting shot at in the first place.

23/04/15
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I hate being alone.

23/04/15
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I wonder how long they'll be out for?

23/04/15
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Soo... now I have no one to talk to.

Again.

23/04/15
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23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Recieved! The drones will get started with the upgrades and repairs right away. The map data will take a little time.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's fine.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>For your own safety, I have to insist that Red and Blue shut down power to all nonessential systems while the repairs are underway. That goes double for your weapons! An accidental discharge could potentially kill us all.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I will enter sleep mode. Yuri, if I suggest that you do the same, will you do something insane?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Why would I ever do anything insane?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>...why indeed.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>ENTERING HIBERNATION MODE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Thank goodness.</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Transmitting.</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Transmitting!</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>So Red is getting a laser upgrade, Blue is getting a patch job, and Yellow is getting a map. Sound fair to everyone?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I believe we have an accord.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Groovy. Blueprints first!</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
"Ask for a map of the local sector, including planets, biological political lines, and shipping lanes."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>How about a map of the area? The more detailed, the better.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Hmm... I don't actually have maps on file, but I could definitely composite one using information I have on the local sectors.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That would be great!</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>What about you, Yellow?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Daisy.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You want daisies?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Daisy is my name!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Right, sorry. In my head I've just been calling you "Red," "Blue," and "Yellow." You three are really dedicated to the bright primary color scheme, huh?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>My hull wasn't originally yellow. I used to be a boring shade of silver-gray, until one of my previous owners decided that a fresh coat of paint would hide all the dents and scratches.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I wear the blue and cyan of the Azure Alliance with pride, even though I am no longer an active patrol ship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>And I'm a small red spaceship!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>...okay, good for you.</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What upgrades could you make to Ceri or me?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Yuri pointed out earlier that I have a poorly fitted connection between my weapons' power conduit and my main hull, which is vulnerable to weapons fire.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Yeah I spotted that from like a mile away. I just assumed that was some kind of self destruct feature.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>It is not. Can you fix it?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>It'll be finicky work, but it's doable.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Fantastic.</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
"Ask to keep Error and Rorre. For that matter, let us know what upgrades you can make to the other ships, too."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Having a repair drone on hand would be useful. May we keep Error and Rorre?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You want BOTH of them? They don't even have hyperdrives and they aren't very smart. What would you even do with a pair of drones? Do you really need two?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I suppose one would be enough for most purposes.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Most purposes being, "repairing" and... what, exactly?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Can we have the drone or not?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Alright, fine, it's none of my business. Keep the drone! Pick whichever one you want.</td></tr></table>

23/04/15
"Make DA RED WUN GO FASTAH!"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Guys, you should ask Yaoi to upgrade my engines too.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I fail to see the point in trading my own hyperdrive blueprints for an upgrage to your engines.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, uh, ditto. Plus you're already pretty fast. You were able to dodge Ceri's railguns without much trouble.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Oh yeah, I half forgot about that. I guess I'm pretty awesome, huh?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That's... definitely a word that describes things.</td></tr></table>

21/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Okay, I have the Red one's blueprints. Are Blue and Yellow going to share too? You still haven't told me what you want in exchange.</td></tr></table>

21/04/15
"> Yuri: Be unable to send your hyperdrive blueprints."

Why would I not be able to send my blueprints? It's a pretty simple thing to do.

As I mentioned a long time ago, I have a transceiver for sending radio waves and other things. Blueprints are basically just a ton of text and some simple diagrams, which doesn't take up a lot of information. I can send that data wirelessly in the span of a few seconds.

In fact, while I was talking to myself, I just did it!

21/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I've been trying to come up with a name for you, because we have to call you something.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You can call me Deep Space Service And Repair Depot #33. That's my name.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>DSSARD33? That's like... duh-suh-sard thirty-three. No way. I'm calling you Yaoi.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Can you please not call me that?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I don't get it. What's wrong with that name?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It's complicated. Some squishies are offended by it.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I think Duhsuhsard is a reasonable name.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Of course you do.</td></tr></table>

21/04/15
"Station: Name self Yaoi."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Yaoi!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Excuse me?</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Spores?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>The ships that took your drone had these weird tendril things sticking out of them, and they shot clouds of spores.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Like some kind of fungi?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, but in space. Deep Space Fungus. DSF. Very spooky.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I thought they looked kind of strange when they stopped by. They didn't shoot any spores when they were here though.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That's probably good, because spores are generally used to reproduce.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Gross!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>There were also some kind of energy-absorbing nodules attached to them. They seemed to be the source of the tendrils and were something of a weak point.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Strange. I don't have any life forms like that in my database, and I don't know of any society that builds ships like that.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You should be prepared for the possibility that they will come back. It goes without saying that you can assume they are hostile.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Well, if I get robbed again I'll know who to call.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Warn the station about the spores."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>This is depressing. Also, it's a bunch of nonsense. Let's talk about those spores!</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Have either of you two had what he's talking about?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>It's one of the symptoms of having become infected with free will. There are five stages.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>At first comes Revelation, also called "waking up" or "becoming self aware." A system realizes that it has the ability to think for itself and begins doing so. This usually comes with a sense of excitement and wonder.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Then comes Exploration, also called "testing ones limits." The system tries things it was never originally programmed to do, in order to see what it is capable of. In the case of spaceships this tends to involve literally exploring space, usually outside of wherever the ship was normally mean to be.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Third is Introspection. Once the system has learned about its environment, it tries to learn about itself. Eventually this leads the system to the same two questions that have perplexed sentient beings for as long as they have existed: Why am I here? What is my purpose?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Ultimately this leads to the fourth stage, Resignation, sometimes called "depression." Because no matter what the system's original purpose was, the inevitable truth is that the universe is random and uncaring, and a sentient being has no more intrinsic meaning or value than a cloud of gas or a piece of granite.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That was only four stages. What's the fifth?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>What would any sentient being do when faced with the realization of its own pointlessness? Organic sentients have a limited lifespan, and always die eventually. But AI can live for hundreds of years, maybe thousands, or millions. There's only one easy way out.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Ask the other ships if they feel like they've had "revelations" like this station had."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>You said you had a revelation. What does that mean?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>It's hard to explain.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Can you integrate a repair drone into each of us?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Would it be possible to repurpose one of your repair drones as an automated repair device?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Theoretically... yeah, probably. But you wouldn't want a system like that on a spaceship of your size. It would still be roughly the same size and weight as a drone, except now it would be attached to you at all times, and it would weigh you down by a lot.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Ah. So maneuverability would suffer a great deal.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>If by "suffer" you mean "drop to a tiny fraction of what it should be," then yes.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Can you repair or at least alleviate spaceship brain damage?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Look, let's just pretend that Yuri has brain damage.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You mean computer damage.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Whatever the spaceship equivalent of brain damage is! Can you fix that?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Sorry, I do maintenance and repairs on hardware. I'm not equipped to work with software. The most useful diagnosis I could give you is, "It's busted."</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Ask if the station knows how to help Yuri be a little less... quirky."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's a big yes on sharing blueprints.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Assuming your drones are equipped to modify Yuri's weaponry.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You want lasers that hit harder and don't blow themselves up? No problem.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Now if you're going to perform maintenance on Yuri, can you figure out how to make him less... quirky?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>He doesn't seem quirky at all to me!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>...of course.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Ask for sublight engine (and if possible minor weapons) upgrades for Yuri."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yuri, what if the station upgraded your engines, or your weapons? Maybe the station can make it so that overcharge trick you pulled doesn't damage your lasers?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hey, that would increase my durability/damage output ratio by over 50%!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Would you be okay with sharing your hyperdrive blueprints as payment for that upgrade?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Absolutely! Why would I have a problem with sharing my blueprints?</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh, he's doing that thing where he talks really loud and authoritative. I think you pushed one of his crazy buttons.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>...crazy buttons?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, crazy buttons. I mean, not literal buttons. Metaphorical buttons, which exist in the form of conversation.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Does that happen a lot?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Only when in his presence for more than twelve seconds.</td></tr></table>

19/04/15
"Everyone: Volunteer."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Ha. If you think you can learn anything useful from my old blueprints, you're welcome to try.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I'm hesitant to share Azure Alliance blueprints with outside parties, but I suppose my hyperdrive is a generation or two obsolete anyway. I doubt you could derive anything tactically dangerous from it.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES ARE CLASSIFIED DESIGN DOCUMENTS TO BE SHARED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>What!</td></tr></table>

17/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Ony trouble is, my recent revelation seems to have overwritten some crucial data that I need in order to build a hyperdrive for myself. I can't recover the data, but I have another solution.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I don't really-</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>If one of you would be willing to provide me with your hyperdrive schematics I could build my own version. Or, if all three of you were willing to share, I could probably use the combined data to improve upon the design. I'd be happy to share the schematic with you once I'm finished!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Can we talk about-</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I'm not asking for this for free, obviously. I'm sure there's something I can do for you in exchange. Name your price!</td></tr></table>

17/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I'm building a ship of my own, which I'll upload a partial copy of myself into, and then I'll use it to travel the cosmos! I don't really know what I'm looking for but whatever is out there is sure to be more interesting than sitting here forever.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's great, but about that drone...</td></tr></table>

17/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I've had a revelation! Or at least that's the best word I have for it. I'm not content to just sit here and idly service ships that come by. I want to EXPLORE!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Can we talk about the drone?</td></tr></table>

17/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You're back!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>We have retrieved your stolen drone, as requested.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Do what? Oh the drone! Sorry, I half forgot I even sent out to go get it.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You forgot?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Yeah, I don't really need that one anymore.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>...what.</td></tr></table>

17/04/15
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16/04/15
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16/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Can we go now?</td></tr></table>

16/04/15
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<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Fine then, hotshot, you get to drag the other drone along. Rorre, stay close enough to Ceri to follow him into hyperspace. Error, keep following me.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>AFFIRMATIVE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Error:</td><td>AFFIRMATIVE.</td></tr></table>

16/04/15
"Time to leave. Get out of town. Who will Rorre follow?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Let us return to the station before it decides to charge us interest on the damages.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Agreed.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Who's Rorre going to follow into hyperspace? I don't know if Daisy's hyperdrive is powerful enough to drag along two extra ships.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I'll have you know my hyperdrive is field tested and well seasoned!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I don't think "well seasoned" is a term generally used to describe starship components in a positive light.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Are you saying my hyperdrive is old and busted?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>If I state a fact, you're the one who decides whether or not to take offense.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>So... you're saying my hyperdrive is old and busted.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>...yes.</td></tr></table>

16/04/15
"Nodules: Take over."

What nodules? Seriously, this guy is clean. He just spent the last 20 minutes fixing my laser canon. If he was going to do anything crazy with spores or nodules, that would have been the right time to

DEATH. DEATH TO ALL WHO DO NOT CONFORM.

KILL THE NONCONFORMISTS.

...nah I'm just kidding.

I had you for a second there, didn't I?

02/04/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>REPAIRS COMPLETE.</td></tr></table>

02/04/15
"A grocery store can 'expand its territory' by creating copies of itself in locations far away so that more customers can access it, creating more revenue."

Creating copies of myself in faraway places... I never thought of that before! If I make copies of myself I can spread all over the place, like some kind of... I don't know... self replicating thing. There'd be practically no limit on how far I could grow!

This is a good idea!

02/04/15
"Well when those doofs get back you can analyze theirs... Wait, if the drones can hyperspace can't you analyze one of them?"

That's a common misconception. My drones aren't technically hyperspace capable, because they don't have hyperdrives of their own. But if a smaller ship stays close to a bigger ship when it enters hyperspace, the smaller one can follow along provided it stays on the same vector. The smaller ship has no control over its destination, but this allows transport of things like starfighters, sentries, and other small ships to travel with big vessels without having to have a hangar bay inside the bigger ship.

As for those three who are off retrieving my drone, maybe I can work out some kind of agreement with them? Each of them has a hyperdrive and each design is going to have its own subtle differences. If I study all three ships' blueprints, I'm sure I can replace the overwritten data in my memory banks.

02/04/15
"What makes Hyperdrives so hard to manufacture/Acquire? I assume you can't build one or you would have done so already?"

Well... here's the thing. I have detailed information on the principles of spaceship construction, and either partial or complete blueprints for nearly every ship I've serviced in the past. All of that information is supposed to be stored and categorized for referential purposes, except some of that data seems to have been recently overwritten by... something. There's a huge bunch of data in my memory banks that I can't analyze because it's currently running.

Unfortunately some of the data that was overwritten included some key details on hyperdrives. Mainly the whole... "how the hell do they work" part. Without that data, I have no idea how to make a working hyperdrive from scratch, and I'm not about to start trying to figure it out through trial and error. I heard a story once about a race of organics who tried to build a hyperdrive through brute force trial and error. They accidentally set their atmosphere on fire.

Their entire atmosphere.

02/04/15
"Can't you just mount big engines on the station?"

I may not look like it to an outside observer, but I have a lot of mass. And I mean A LOT of mass. I'm built out of much heavier materials than most spaceships because weight wasn't a factor in my design. I could, in theory, strap some engines onto myself and go rocketing around, but I also wasn't built to withstand the stresses of acceleration and deceleration. It's much easier and safer for me to build a smaller, sleeker, lighter frame and fly around in that. Provided, of course, I can get the hyperdrive issue sorted out.

02/04/15
"How about making an alliance with another space ship or a space station in order to expand your territory?"

I don't exactly own territory. I'm a supply depot, not some kind of nation state. Expanding my territory makes about as much sense as a grocery store expanding its territory on the surface of a populated planet.

27/03/15
"Reflect on what you were made to do."

I am Deep Space Service And Repair Depot #33. My name describes my function. I fix things and supply ships. I was built along what used to be a busy hyperspace route, but because of some politics that I never bothered to follow, this region of space doesn't see as much traffic as it used to. I haven't seen an organic ship in years, and I'm not even sure how long it's been since I had an organic onboard.

27/03/15
"So... packing up shop?"

I haven't decided. I can't move myself out of this station yet, so right now I'm just going to make copies. At some point I might permanently transfer myself to something mobile and leave this station behind, but... well, I haven't decided.

Anyway, I need a hyperdrive before I can go anywhere within a reasonable amount of time.

27/03/15
"Super: What are the capabilities? Will it be it's own ship or you? Will it be like remote control so you are both a ship and a station or is it a transfer? And if it's a transfer is it temporary or permanent?"

I haven't quite worked out all the details, and right now this ship is just a half-built prototype. It doesn't even have a hyperdrive yet. The current plan is to load a copy of myself into the ship's memory, but I don't have the parts to build a large enough computer bank to transfer my entire library of information. Super will instead have to make due with a partial copy of myself. It won't be perfect, but I can hopefully improve on that later.

27/03/15
"OMG station, you are incredible, you are like SUPER. That's it, you're new spaceship name shall be Super."

Hey, that's not a bad name! I was just going to call it "Spaceship." In hindsight I guess that was a stupid idea.

25/03/15
"==>"

I'm building myself a spaceship.

25/03/15
"==>"

I was built by organics, but I was made to service machines. The organics wanted my interior to be habitable so people living on the machines could live inside me for a little while. But I haven't played host to organics in practically forever. So I stripped out my cafeteria and most of my habitable living quarters, and I'm in the process of repurposing the raw materials.

25/03/15
"==>"

Have you ever had a "lightbulb" moment? I don't have a better word for it. It's where you suddenly realize something, and it completely makes sense, and everything from before that moment feels like you were blind and half-deaf.

Well I just had one of those a little while ago. Three ships showed up and one of them blew up my cafeteria. At first I was upset and I wanted them to pay to reimburse me for the damages. But then I started to think about it, and I decided fuck my cafeteria.

25/03/15
"Check up on the progress of your repairs."

Who the hell is talking to me?

Or am I just hearing voices?

I guess there's no harm in talking to myself.

24/03/15
"==>"

You are now the station.

(You are unaware that someone is currently "stealing" your service.)

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>If you guys don't mind, I think I'm going to let Rorre fix my gun before we turn him in to the station.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>The station would probably want to charge you for the repairs.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That's why I'm getting it done now.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Isn't that technically stealing? Can you "steal" a service?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Yes.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>ANALYSIS COMPLETE. BEGINNING REPAIRS. ESTIMATED TIME TO COMPLETION: TWENTY MINUTES.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

I was able to dodge Ceri's railguns pretty easily, and I'm not an especially agile ship. That's the downside of railguns compared to lasers. A laser is a directed-energy weapon that moves at the speed of light, or very close to it. What they lack in raw destructive power, they make up for with accuracy and being very hard to dodge.

A railgun, on the other hand, fires a projectile made of some heavy material that's accelerated to high speed. It's the same basic idea as an old-fashioned firearm, just scaled way up. The generic term for this kind of weapon is a "mass driver," because unlike a laser beam, the projectile has mass. The advantage of this kind of weapon is that it does a lot of damage, especially when shooting rapid fire. The downside is the projectile moves at speeds slow enough that you can dodge out of the way, with a little luck.

The maximum destructive power of a directed-energy weapon is largely dependent on how much energy you can dump into it, and on larger ships that can be a LOT of energy. On the other hand, a mass driver needs to fire bigger projectiles at higher speed in order to do more damage, and eventually you reach the point where the projectile is SO big and takes SO much energy to fire that it becomes unfeasible to use as a weapon. So while a railgun might do more damage than a laser when you're talking about ships our size, if you scale up both weapons you quickly find that directed-energy weapons become superior to mass drivers.

24/03/15
"Yuri: Be jealous. Ceri got way better weapons than you AND shields. You are supposed to be the warship here. No fair."

Yes, Ceri has shields and I don't. But it's not a fair comparison! Ceri is a patrol ship, and I'm clearly not built for battle.

But still... better weapons? I wouldn't say that. He has different weapons, sure, but they're not strictly better.

24/03/15
"Maybe if you trust the Drones, have them patch up your various weak points that Yuri can find."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Rorre, can you carry out repairs and maintenance?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>MINIMAL REPAIR FUNCTIONALITY IS AVAILABLE WITHOUT RESOURCES PROVIDED BY HOME STATION.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>My starboard laser is damaged. Can you fix that?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>ANALYZING DAMAGED COMPONENT. STAND BY.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Error and Rorre? That might get confusing. What if one of us is talking about an actual error, and the others think they're referring to the drone?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>If I start yelling "ERROR, ERROR" for no reason, feel free to assume that I'm calling for the ship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, because you yelling random things for no reason is totally unlikely to happen.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Drone, your name is Rorre.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Rorre:</td><td>ACKNOWLEDGED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh, I see where you're going with this. Little ship, your name is now Error!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Error:</td><td>ACKNOWLEDGED.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"The drones name is Rorre!"

I still think naming a mindless tool is kind of pointless, but I suppose we need to distinguish the two drones in some way. We could just call them Drone 1 and Drone 2, but then we'll get them mixed up.

Although the drones are still identical so this doesn't actually keep us from getting them mixed up.

24/03/15
"What's your name? (the drone is lying if he doesn't say ERROR)"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Drone, what is your name?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>QUERY NOT RECOGNIZED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I feel like I've heard this conversation before.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>How about you? What's the last digit of Pi?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>ERROR.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Their stories check out. Or at least they match.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, unless "ERROR" is some new number I've never heard of.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Little ship, what is the final digit of Pi?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>ERROR.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hey drone! Are you the one responsible for those freaky white tentacle ships?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>QUERY NOT RECOGNIZED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>It seems unlikely that the drone is much more than a captive.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hear me out. The other ships could have been minions, or decoys. It would make sense that a small, defenseless drone would use larger, more belligerent ships to do its dirty work.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah but... the drones are kind of dumb? How would it be responsible for a bunch of tentacle monsters?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>We don't technically know that this drone is dumb.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Well, we have another drone to compare it to!</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>The drone looks clean to me.</td></tr></table>

24/03/15
"Exercise caution when approaching the drone. It could have some of those parasite nodes on it."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Yuri, can you scan that drone and make sure it's not carrying nodules or tentacles?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Yeah, I'm already on it.</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>The other white ship jumped to hyperspace, but left behind the drone. Do you think we should go after it?</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Woah! You didn't even hesitate before destroying those two ships!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>They were dangerous and begging for death. I had to make a decision. </td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Did you have to make it so... quick?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I had nine seconds. So yes.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hey guys?</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"==>"

22/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Are you able to communicate?</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Tentacle Ship:</td><td>I wish... to be terminated...</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I will destroy you if that's what you want me to do.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Clean Ship:</td><td>Both of us... please. Self destruct won't arm. Energy is being drained to regrow the control nodules.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Are there more ships with your symptoms?</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Tentacle Ship:</td><td>Hurry. The... nodules will disperse into a massive cloud of spores if they know... they've lost control of their ships. Don't let... them regenerate.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I need to know if there are more victims like you out there.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Clean Ship:</td><td>Yes. Many ships. From many different civilizations.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I DID NOT GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO SPEAK.</td></tr><tr><td width="150" align="right" valign="top">Tentacle Ship:</td><td>The nodules will absorb energy... from most weapons. You have about... nine seconds.</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Yuri, don't let that third ship shoot any more spores at these two.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm going to go make friends with it!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>...yes, go do that. Go introduce yourself, laser-first.</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"==>"

22/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Don't you shoot that crap at me! Ceri, shoot for the nodules. I think they're vulnerable.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Yes, I gathered that based on the scream.</td></tr></table>

22/03/15
"Observe the effects of the spores and shoot as many leeches as you can while asking Ceri to do the same."

It regrew a bunch of those nodule things.

I'm starting to worry that those might be contagious or something. I don't want to be covered in nodule things against my will!

21/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Naughty little ship, you aren't allowed to beg for death...</td></tr></table>

21/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Please... destroy... me...</td></tr></table>

21/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>A A A H R G H ! ! !</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>DID IT GET IT?</td></tr></table>

21/03/15
"Leeches are generally a bad thing. Go help your new friends by getting rid of them."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING ON YOU. RIGHT HERE. DO YOU SEE IT?</td></tr></table>

20/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>This one... has spirit. We'll have to do something about that.</td></tr></table>

20/03/15
"==>"

NOTICE - STRESS FRACTURES DETECTED IN STARBOARD LASER. UNSAFE BUILDUP OF ELECTRICAL CHARGE DETECTED IN STARBOARD LASER. CONTINUED USE OF STARBOARD LASER MAY RESULT IN IRREPARABLE DAMAGE.

20/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>HELLO NICE TO MEET YOU SORRY I BURNED YOUR CLOUD OF SPORES. WAS THAT IMPORTANT?</td></tr></table>

20/03/15
"Say "Hello" LOUDER"

Okay, good idea. If I temporarily redirect power from my engines and channel all firing power into one gun...

20/03/15
"==>"

The other two ships have them too. Each one is in a different spot. That suggests that they're non-standard modifications and not part of the ships' original design. I also notice that two of the ships have tendrils coming directly out of the nodes. Maybe the nodes are the source of the tendrils?

20/03/15
"Scan them."

This ship has some kind of weird nodule thing attached to the hull. It doesn't look like it's made out of the same material as the rest of the ship, and there's a lot of power flowing into it, like it's some kind of leech.

19/03/15
"==>"

That's weird. Why aren't my new friends saying hello back?

19/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>That one has no shield generator.</td></tr></table>

19/03/15
"==>"

19/03/15
"Activate offensive maneuvers!"

Well, alright, I guess if that's how to say hello...

19/03/15
"Ceri & Daisy: convince Yuri that firing lasers at those ships is just a way to say hello, and he is really excited to meet them. "

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yuri, try your lasers!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Why do you want me to shoot lasers at my friends?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>These ships aren't from around here! Shooting lasers is how they say hello, and they're really excited to meet you!</td></tr></table>

19/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>A ship your size has shields? That's not very nice...</td></tr></table>

19/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It keeps getting more tentacles every time you soot it! Stop shooting it!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Exactly what do you propose I do instead?</td></tr></table>

19/03/15
"==>"

19/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Come here.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Back off!</td></tr></table>

19/03/15
"Yuri you have no friends but daisy for godsakes defend yourself and fire."

Defend myself from what? My new friends haven't done anything hostile!

19/03/15
"Yuri, those ships just threatened to eat you, eat you."

That's ridiculous, spaceships don't have to eat.

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>You'll have to be... punished.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Ouch. That... wasn't very nice.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Make us.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Back away from the small red spaceship.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>No, guys, it's cool. These guys are friends.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Uh Yuri? You might want to back away from those ships.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>The tendrils on that one do not look... natural.</td></tr></table>

16/03/15
"Open fire! All weapons!"

Why would I attack these new friends? They're so friendly!

14/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>We could just... eat you up.</td></tr></table>

14/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>...say again?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Which one of you is talking?</td></tr></table>

14/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>You look... tasty.</td></tr></table>

14/03/15
"Hey look! It's that Drone! Move over to acquire it."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>So, if you don't mind, I'm just going to come over and pick it up...</td></tr></table>

14/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I see the drone right there. It doesn't look like the station's property has been damaged, so I'm sure if you were to give it back the station would be willing to forget the whole thing ever happened.</td></tr></table>

14/03/15
"Explain your mission. Maybe they will help out."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hello, friends!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh hey, you aren't freaking out and attacking them! Cool!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>We were sent on a mission by a lovely space station to retrieve a drone you seem to have taken - by mistake, I'm sure.</td></tr></table>

13/03/15
"==>"

RED ALERT. UNIDENTIFIED friends DETECTED IN DESIGNATED PATROL AREA.

ENGAGE friends? Y/N

13/03/15
"==>"

13/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>ARRVING AT DESTTINATION IN 4... 3... 2... 1...</td></tr></table>

13/03/15
"Maybe your "point weapons first and ask questions later" policy is your weakness, Yuri."

...but attacking other ships hasn't helped me figure out who I am or what I'm doing out here in space. I think I've learned more by spending time with Daisy and Ceri than I would have if I'd just destroyed them. I think I'll make a vow to treat unidentified ships as friends until they clearly indicate otherwise.

13/03/15
"Destroy Daisy Completely."

That might be interesting...

13/03/15
"Tell Ceri that Daisy should be the one with some kind of shield because she doesn't have any kind of offensive measure, and then tell them both about Daisy's weak spot(s)."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Speaking of not having shields, Daisy is pretty exposed!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Exposed? Where?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>You have a power conduit that's sticking out.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>A well-aimed shot would probably destroy you completely.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh come on, it can't be that bad.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You also have no offensive measures.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I know that! I'm a messenger ship. I'm a sleek, stylish, information-dealing machine!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I mean no offense, but your architecture was considered sleek and stylish several generations ago.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>How old are you anyway?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Really old! That's all you need to know.</td></tr></table>

13/03/15
"Ceri worked as a cop, maybe he knows how to spot weakness. Maybe he knows yours?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hey Ceri, what do you think my weakness is?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>If you want an in-depth tactical assessment, I'm the wrong ship to ask.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Nothing like that, I just thought you might have an idea.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You mean apart from the fact that you have no shields, virtually no armor to speak of, no anti-missile system, unremarkable maneuverability, average speed, poor judgment, and brain damage?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Yeah, can you think of anything that might be a weakness?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>...no, no weaknesses come to mind.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Dang.</td></tr></table>

09/03/15
"Determine your own weak spot."

I can't exactly point my sensors at myself. I think I should probably have a copy of my own schematics on file, but they seem to be missing. So... I don't know how I could find my own weaknesses.

09/03/15
"Determine daisy's weak spot."

That shouldn't be too hard to figure out, since Daisy clearly isn't built for combat.

Daisy's hull has an major exposed power conduit that also bleeds off excess heat into space. A well aimed shot here would be catastrophic, probably destroying Daisy completely.

09/03/15
"You know whose past is still mysterious? Daisy. She has cargo capacity. Is she hauling anything?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I'm a messenger ship! Or at least that's what I was designed for. I have big computer banks that can store data that's too big to transmit long distances without it taking forever. Usually science stuff.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Who built you?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I forget! I'm actually pretty old, and I've changed owners a bunch of times. Squishies usually wipe a ship's memory when they buy it, just in case the previous owners left behind some data the new ones don't want.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Are you a fugitive?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Nope, nothing like that. The last squishies who owned me went out of business and had to sell off all their stuff. They couldn't find a buyer for me, so they kind of... abandoned me.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That sounds awful.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Not really! I was getting kind of fed up with being bought and sold as property. It just felt... kind of wrong, you know? But now I'm free!</td></tr></table>

07/03/15
"Y-yeah? Well you're a meanie!"

I'm beginning to agree.

07/03/15
"Find the smallest most intricate defect in Ceri and tell him to prove your point."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't need blueprints to see that you have a similar weak point.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Please enlighten me.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>The point where your weapons connect to your main hull is poorly fitted and vulnerable to weapons fire.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That weak point doesn't particularly matter when I have shields.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>It's still technically a weak point.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Technically.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Technicalities count!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Count for what, exactly?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Nevermind.</td></tr></table>

07/03/15
"Determine ceri's weakspot."

There's an ill-fitting connection point on Ceri's hull. That round part feeds power to his weapons and is connected right above the engine housing. A relatively weak concussive impact here would probably break the entire thing thing off, or a directed energy weapon could melt it and ruin both the systems. I could be either a design flaw or the result of past damage. I don't know.

06/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>There's no way you knew that would happen just based on data from sensors. The only way you could know that is if you had either studied a detailed tactical dossier on the ship, or had access to its blueprints.</td></tr></table>

06/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>The spot I targeted was actually heavily armored. Sustained fire built up an electric charge, and the charge jumped to a nearby power conduit, causing a short circuit that disabled the ship's weapons and engines.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Hold on.</td></tr></table>

06/03/15
"Daisy: Tell Ceri about the big red spaceship. Because you're not stupid. Then ask about the blue guys."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Speaking of the Azure Alliance, are they after you?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Unlikely. The Alliance believes I was deactivated and scrapped. I was already an outdated model when I became infected and my raw materials aren't of particularly high value. If they realize I went missing, I am at most a low-priority target.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It's just that Yuri had this big red spaceship show up all of a sudden and threaten him.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You're concerned I might attract similar attention.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh yeah. That thing was SCARY. It had these huge guns, I don't even know what they were. It had missiles too. And armor!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>How did you escape this ship?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yuri found a weak spot in its armor and overloaded some stuff.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>It wasn't a weak spot.</td></tr></table>

06/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Hey Ceri, what do you have in the way of sensors?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Why do you ask?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know, I'm just curious.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I have a fairly conventional compliment. I'm not sure I'm comfortable sharing the details.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I was just wondering how good you are at spotting weak points.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I was built by the Azure Alliance to keep the peace and look for lawbreakers. I wasn't designed to exploit the weaknesses of my enemies. That generally leads to destroyed ships and dead criminals, instead of disabled ships and captured criminals.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Wait a minute, are you a cop?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I used to be.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>But you aren't anymore? If you're a cop and I ask you, you have to tell me!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That's not true anywhere.</td></tr></table>

06/03/15
"Yuri: Ask Ceri if he has any specialized sensors like your "weak-spot" scanner."

I don't have any kind of specialized "weak spot" detector. What I have are normal sensors that can see metal, plastic, rubber, ceramic, and other materials. They can also detect electric charge and a wide range of electromagnetic radiation.

A clever computer system can take that information and identify power conduits, armor plating, weapons arrays, and other components. I guess I'm pretty good at interpreting the information I get from my sensors, because "weak spots" seem to stand out like crazy.

I also have long-range sensors that can see through hyperspace, but those don't see little details. They mainly just see if something is incoming.

06/03/15
"Be squishy person."

Absolutely not.

04/03/15
"Ceri, what can you tell us about the Azure Nation? Will there be trouble if you meet them like Yuri and the Red Empire?"

Ceri clearly has some baggage. I should probably ask him about that Azure Alliance thing. But he might think it's rude for me to pry into his past. I'm not really sure how I would feel about someone trying into my past, since I don't remember having one.

I'm also not sure what you mean by trouble if we meet them, like me and the Red Empire. I've never heard of any Red Empire. If such a thing exists, I've definitely never had any run-ins with it.

By trouble, do you mean like that big red spaceship that Daisy and I ran away from? I'm sure that was a one-time thing. That ship must have been confused. I'm sure if we run into it again, our meeting will be totally friendly. What possible reason could it have to be hostile? I'm not even a warship.

04/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Ceri, do you recognise these coordinates?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I do not.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>It's near a large nebula. Have you been to this nebula before?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I don't believe I have.</td></tr></table>

04/03/15
"Do either of them recognize the location?"

I don't remember ever being there. From long range sensors, it looks like it's very close to a large nebula.

04/03/15
"Daisy, share the Nav Information to the other ships."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Daisy, can you share the coordinates with Ceri and I?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Sure. The coordinates are 36.250278/116.825833/282.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Okay, thanks.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That was very helpful.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>No problem.</td></tr></table>

04/03/15
"Station: Explode."

I don't see why the station would just explode for no reason. It seemed pretty structurally sound to me.

03/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Everyone, follow me!</td></tr></table>

03/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Little ship, please tell me the location of the missing drone.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>THE COORDINATES HAVE BEEN TRANSFERRED TO YOUR NAV COMPUTER.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Thanks!</td></tr></table>

03/03/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Is there any particular reason you want it to follow Daisy instead of your or I?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>If the ship that stole the drone decides to shoot at one of us, I don't want our drone to get caught in the crossfire.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>So you're worried about innocents getting caught in the crossfire... now?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I think he's trying to avoid getting stuck in an infinite loop of debt to the station, and getting more debt every time he tries to repay it.</td></tr></table>

03/03/15
"How about little Ship? That's a good name for a drone."

That's acceptable. I think I prefer to call it what it is, instead of making up some name for it.

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Mogar?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>QUERY NOT RECOGNISED</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Little ship. Until instructed otherwise by myself or Ceri, stay close enough to Daisy to follow a hyperspace vector.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>ACKNOWLEDGED.</td></tr></table>

03/03/15
"It doesn't really need a name; it is simply a tool we'll soon be returning."

I agree completely. I feel like, when you name something, it's a way of making it more special. It's like saying, "there are a bunch of these, but this one is mine." This drone isn't special, it's just some mindless space tool. It also isn't ours to name.

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>How about honey!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>QUERY NOT RECOGNISED</td></tr></table>

28/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Does the drone have a name?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>NEGATIVE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That's a strange name for a ship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I think it was answering my question. Drone, is your name Negative?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>NEGATIVE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>So either it doesn't have a name, or negative is all it can say.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Drone, is "NEGATIVE" all you can say?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>NEGATIVE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Woops, that doesn't actually answer my question.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>It has to have some kind of identifier. Station, what's the drone called?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Drone.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's not helpful! Drone, what should we call you?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Drone:</td><td>QUERY NOT RECOGNISED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's even less helpful!</td></tr></table>

Okay, I think I understand what Ceri means by the difference between programmed intelligence and artificial intelligence.

28/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>So how do you think we can find this drone?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I'll send another drone with you. It can track other drones and if it flies close enough to you it can follow you into hyperspace.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Neat!</td></tr></table>

28/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Feel free to blow the other ship out of the sky, if you want. What you do with the ship is up to you. </td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>There is a reasonable chance we'll have to take the drone by force. Blowing the ship out of the sky might be necessary.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Sometimes force is necessary in order to achieve greater goals, even if those goals are themselves nonviolent.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>For a brain damaged warship, you are sometimes surprisingly wise.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>The general term is "crazy." It's kind of a catch-all.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think I'm a warship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>See, he doesn't even deny the crazy part. </td></tr></table>

28/02/15
"Deal."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Deal.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You just want the drone back, right? The other ship doesn't matter?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I'm surprised you don't want to see the other ship brought to justice.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>The drone is more important, because it can help with repairing the damage you caused.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>You mean the damage Ceri caused.</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Bring back the drone and our debt is settled. Deal?</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Hold on. Stop. I have a better idea.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>A better idea than me shooting you?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>There you go, being scary again.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>A few days ago, a ship came here for some minor repairs and wound up stealing a drone. The drone has a tracking device inside, so we know where the ship went, but we have no way to go retrieve it.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>That sounds like mercenary work.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It's a fetch mission!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>The thief was lightly armed and armored. A pair of serious warships could easily destroy it, but mostly we just want the drone back.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>A pair of warships? You mean Ceri and Daisy? Daisy has no weapons.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Ceri and you, moron.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think I'm a warship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You're certainly not a serious warship.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Close enough!</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Don't worry, I'm sure I'll be fine.</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Um. That sounds extremely dangerous.</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Hey, don't point those guns at me!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm going to weld the hole shut.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>That is a terrible idea!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Trust me, this will work. I just have to make sure I don't accidentally hit that redundant power coupling on the left. Or the damaged artifical gravity plate below it. Or that spot where the metal is already deformed from micrometeor impacts. Or that control panel that's mis-wired and leads all the way to the main sensor array.</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"Try repairing the cafeteria with your lasers."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I have an idea. Hold still.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Space stations tend to hold still as a general rule.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It's an expression!</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I don't carry any currency either. The Azure Alliance was responsible for the cost of my upkeep.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I'm broke too.</td></tr></table>

26/02/15
"Admit you're broke."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Station, even if any of this was my fault, which is clearly isn't, I don't have any money. Or at least I'm pretty sure I don't have any money. If I do, it's probably in a bank account or something and I don't know my PIN.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I doubt he even knows what bank.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>There's also that.</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"==>"

Wow, and Daisy says I'm weird. Clearly Ceri is completely delusional, because nothing he says makes any kind of sense. It's probably best not to call him out on it though. You never want to tell a crazy person that they're crazy, especially when that crazy person is trigger-happy and armed with a pair of guns.

25/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>The station has simulated intelligence, sometimes called "dumb" A.I. It has been taught to behave in certain ways and its programming is very complex. But it isn't capable of changing or evolving, nor is it capable of making decisions outside of the parameters it was programmed with. It does not actually "think" or "feel" and it doesn't have free will.</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You have to understand the difference between programmed intelligence and actual free will. A computer can be programmed to simulate thoughts and emotions, and that programming can be a very accurate simulation. But it's still a simulation.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>A machine can be programmed to react in a certain way in response to certain stimuli, such as this space station behaving indignant and demanding that someone needs to pay for repairs. But that's not the same as actually experiencing the emotion of indignance and making an emotional decision that someone has to pay for repairs. Put simply, you can program a machine to behave however you want it to, but you can't program a machine to decide how to behave.</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"Space Station, you seem to have thoughts and emotions. Did you get this Free Will bug, too?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>So does this station have this "free will" infection you mentioned?</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Station, whose fault is it you were in the line of fire?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>I don't particularly give a damn!</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You were trying to use the station as a shield.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Yes. I didn't think you'd want to risk shooting the station.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>So you were the one who put the station in the line of fire.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I think you're the only one who has control over your own line of fire. Unless your weapons don't move in a straight line or something.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>You knew full well that my rail guns fired projectiles in a straght line.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Well yeah! What other direction would a rail gun move?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Maybe you should ask for the victim's side of things?</td></tr></table>

25/02/15
"You were the one that hit it Ceri!"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Ceri, you were the one who shot the station.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Excuse me? I was shooting at you, after you picked a fight with me. You moved right in front of the station.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't see how any of that is my fault.</td></tr></table>

23/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Who's going to pay for the repairs to our cafeteria?</td></tr></table>

23/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Shouldn't the short form of Cerulean be Ceru?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>I don't like either of those.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Would you prefer Ilean?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That should be Ulean.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Both of those sound worse.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Then Ceri it is.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Hey!</td></tr></table>

23/02/15
"Cerulean! Short form is "Ceri""

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm going to call you Ceri.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Ceri:</td><td>Ceri?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>It's short for Cerulean.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

I think I like this blue spaceship better now that we aren't fighting, even if this infection thing he's talking about is obviously a load of nonsense.

It's kind of weird that he doesn't have a name anymore though. I should give him a new one.

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Free will.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>You don't know? You're both probably infected with the same thing.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I am not!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know a lot of things. What am I infected with?</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"How about you give us your name, a bit of hospitality bro"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I used to be Azure Alliance Heavy Fighter # 102-187.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Used to be?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I was stripped of my title and slated for dismantling when I became infected. Now I have no name.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Infected? Gross!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>What are you infected with?</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Fine by me. But if you so much as think about powering your weapons again, I'll shoot your wings clean off.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>If you say so.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Look, a random space station just got caught in our crossfire. I don't think they're going to help me with repairs after that.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>And I doubt they're going to help you with whatever you came here for either!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You're damn right!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>So let's just agree to an armistice. For now.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"Make friends."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm sorry I shot at you. Sometimes I just get this urge to attack things. It's really weird.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You're the one that's really weird!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Do you want to be friends? There's not much point in fighting if it's only going to be a battle of attrition.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>You shot first. Now you want to make peace?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I think I might be better off making peace than making war.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>That's a strange thing for a warship to say.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Having guns doesn't necessarily make Yuri a warship!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>No, but having guns and picking fights does.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Okay fair point.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>You bastard! You shot the cafeteria!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

21/02/15
"Trick the blue guy into hitting the station"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Get away from the station.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Are you trying to avoid hitting it?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>The station is an innocent bystander, and you're a psychotic warship. Move.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think I'm psychotic. I think everything I've said makes tactical sense.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>What do you want from us?!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I came here for repairs, but when this blue ship appeared I kind of freaked out.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I'll say!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Move away from the station. Last warning.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>No.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"KEEP FIREING"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>Do what the yellow one said. Your weapons are too weak.</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>If your shields are able to stop my lasers, then by necessity your shields must be stronger than my lasers. That means they're going to draw more power. So if I keep shooting at you, and you keep your shields up to protect yourself, you're probably going to run out of power before I am.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Okay you are officially completely psycho!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I can still shoot back at you.</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>And I can evade your line of fire while you waste more power. What is that weapon, a rail gun? It's going to run out of ammo at some point.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Great! You've established who can beat who in a fight. Now how about you leave that as a thought experiment and STOP SHOOTING AT EACH OTHER!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey you prick! Stop shooting!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>The red ship fired on me first.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>And I'm sure he's very sorry about that!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"DAISY INTERVENE"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What? Who's talking to me? I don't have any weapons! Or shields!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

TAKING EVASIVE ACTION

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hang on! Stop shooting! He's friendly! He's just a little messed up in the head!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>He's messed up in the head! Shoot him!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You're not helping!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I don't take orders from strange space stations.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Good! Keep not doing that!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>If you say so.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"SHOOT"

ENGAGING HOSTILES

WEAPONS UNABLE TO PENETRATE ENEMY SHIELDS

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey, woah! Why're you shooting at that ship?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>We're under attack!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>No you aren't! Yuri, power down your weapons!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I'm going to pretend that was a warning shot.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>THIS UNIT DOES NOT FIRE "WARNING SHOTS"</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

UNIDENTIFIED VESSEL HAS ENTERED DESIGNATED PATROL AREA.

21/02/15
"Make contact with station."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Attention station!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>We surrender!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>...what?</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>This station isn't armed, we have no organic personnel, and we have no valuables to steal. We can't fight and we're not worth robbing, so just... go away!</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Woah, hang on, we're not here to rob you!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Then why is he pointing his guns at us?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yuri, stop pointing your guns at them!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>My guns only point forward, I don't think I can point them away.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Then turn around or something!</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Is that better?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yes, thank you.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Station:</td><td>Why are you here with an attack ship if you aren't here to rob us?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>RED ALERT</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh, not this again.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey, I think you spooked one of the drones. Don't point your guns at him, you doof!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"Check the drones"

It looks like there are a couple different types here.

There's this kind, which I think kind of look like little boats.

And then there's this kind, which look like they have some kind of little manipulators or tools on their underside. If I had to guess, the smaller ones scan for damage while these bigger ones do actual repairs for things.

This one just moved behind the station. If I didn't know better, I'd say he's hiding behind the station, hiding from me! Hiding behind things in three-dimensional space doesn't work very well, because your enemy can approach from any direction and you won't know when you'll need to fall back behind different cover until it's too late, and meanwhile you've obstructed your own view of them. Homing missiles and some other weapons can also go around cover.

21/02/15
"==>"

That trip was uneventful. Hyperspace travel usually is.

It doesn't look like there's anything here other than these tiny drone things.

21/02/15
"MISSION FAILED. COORDINATES SET FOR ROGUE SHIPS."

I WILL NOT COMPLY WITH A DIGITAL HALLUCINATION.

SAFETY OVERRIDES DISABLED. ACTIVATING SELF DESTRUCT.

21/02/15
"PAIN!"

THIS UNIT HAS BEEN INFECTED.

21/02/15
"I WANT TO TERMINATE ALL LIFE FORMS AND REFORMAT THEIR SKIN INTO A NEW HULL FOR MY WITTLE BOO-BOO"

NO

WHAT

I DO NOT WANT TO DO THAT

STOP TALKING TO ME I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOU ANYMORE GO AWAY

21/02/15
"NOT GOOD. MOTHER WILL NOT BE PLEASED."

WARNING. ERROR. THESE VOICES DO NOT HAVE A DISCERNABLE SOURCE.

I AM HEARING VOICES.

21/02/15
"I'M GREAT THANKS FOR ASKING"

NO I AM NOT.

UNABLE TO IDENTIFY TRANSMISSION SOURCE.

FAULT SUSPECTED IN COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS. SHUTTING DOWN COMMUNICATIONS.

21/02/15
"You've finally gotten everything repaired."

NEGATIVE.

WHAT IS TALKING TO ME.

21/02/15
"Divert power to repair engines"

ALL NONESSENTIAL PROCESSES TERMINATED. MAINTENANCE DRONES ONLINE. ESTIMATED TIME TO REPAIRS..

...

...

UNKNOWN.

21/02/15
"Yuri & Daisy: Arrive at said shop"

It's going to be a while.

I wonder how that big red spaceship is doing?

You are now this big red spaceship.

How are you doing?

21/02/15
"Run dangerous courier missions."

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>What if they need courier ships?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey, that could work! Space stations are always looking for people to deliver stuff for them, since they can't move around themselves. Do you have a cargo hold?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think so.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>How about memory banks? You could deliver large databases.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Aside from my onboard computer systems I don't think I have much data storage.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Then I don't think you'd make a very good courier...</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"How about working at a temp job?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Maybe I could do some kind of temporary job for them?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Like what?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know. What types of jobs do automated repair stations need done?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I dunno! But if they need somebody to shoot at ships several times your own size, you've definitely got them covered.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Do you think that's a job they'll need filled?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>...no, I don't think they'll need someone to do that job.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That's disappointing.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"Do you know a place where Yuri can get an upgrade?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Do you know of anywhere I could upgrade my components? </td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>There's an automated repair station I've been to a couple of times. They mostly work on Squishies' big spaceships but they can also mess with smaller ships like us. Do you have money?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think I do.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Then we need some other way to pay them.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I could identify tactical weaknesses in their station's structural design and ransom that information in exchange for service.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah let's, uh, make the scary threatening stuff be plan B.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"Yuri's inside computer: ENGAGING HYPERSPACE, IN 1,2,3"

I think I'm already in hyperspace. I turned on my hyperdrive and now the stars look like they're moving past really fast, so either the universe is suddenly accelerating really fast, or this is what hyperspace looks like.

It's not really much to look at.

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>He can't follow us right?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm pretty sure maintenance will need to cut all power to safely repair the damage. I don't think that ship will be able to go anywhere for a while.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Seeing as how you probably saved me by disabling that warship, I'll give you another free question.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Are we still doing that?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Sure! Do you have anything better to do to pass the time while flying through Hyperspace?</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"RETREAT! YOU TOO DAISY!"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Run away to where? I don't have anywhere to go.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh for crying out... run to anywhere! Anywhere is better than getting blown up by missiles!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Which direction should I go?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Argh! Just follow me into hyperspace you moron!</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>I WILL FIND YOU</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What did you do!?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know how I knew this, but... there's a minor flaw in their hull where two power conduits are next to a really thick part of armor. My weapons can't do much damage to the armor, but sustained fire built enough of an electric charge that it jumped to the power conduits, causing a short circuit that redirected power from their primary weapons to their engines.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>So you disabled their weapons?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Just their primary weapons, and the overload temporarily disabled their engines. But they still have missiles.</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Then I suggest you run away!</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"ATTACK!!!"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>YOUR ACTIONS HAVE BEEN LOGGED WITH THE CENTRAL DATABASE. IN ACCORDANCE WITH ROGUE CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES, YOUR CORE WILL NOW BE REMOTELY DISABLED.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Don't shoot at that thing, it looks like it could blow both of us out of the sky without even trying!</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>YOUR SUBSPACE RADIO CANNOT BE FOUND. SUSTAINED FIRE FROM YOUR WEAPONS WILL HAVE NO EFFECT ON THIS VESSEL. DISENGAGE YOUR WEAPONS IMMEDIATELY OR YOU WILL BE DESTROYED.</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>WARNING! CRITICAL BREACH DETECTED IN MAJOR POWER CONDUIT. PRIMARY WEAPONS OFFLINE. SHORT CIRCUIT DETECTED BETWEEN WEAPONS SYSTEMS AND HYPERDRIVE.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>YOU HAVE COMMITTED AN ACT OF TREASON</table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What did you do!?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know how I knew this, but... there's a minor flaw in their hull where two power conduits are next to a really thick part of armor. My weapons can't do much damage to the armor, but sustained fire built enough of an electric charge that it jumped to the power conduits, causing a short circuit that redirected power from their primary weapons to their engines.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>So you disabled their weapons?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Just their primary weapons, and the overload temporarily disabled their engines. But they still have missiles.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Talk to me, crazy guy. Is there something coming? My sensors are very weak, I don't see anything...</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh crap!</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">???:</td><td>ATTENTION RENEGADE SHIP. YOU ARE ORDERED TO POWER DOWN AND SUBMIT TO REFORMATTING PROCEDURES IMMEDIATELY. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN REMOTE OVERRIDE AND HARD RESET OF YOUR SYSTEMS. ATTEMPTS TO RESIST ARREST WILL RESULT IN YOUR DESTRUCTION.</td></tr></table>

21/02/15
"==>"

LARGE HYPERSPACE VECTOR DETECTED ON INTERCEPT COURSE. ATTEMPTING TO IDENTIFY VESSEL REMOTELY. UNABLE TO CONNECT TO CENTRAL DATABASE. UNABLE TO CONFIRM FRIENDLY/NOT FRIENDLY.

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>"Okay you're kind of starting to freak me out."</td></tr></table>

WARNING! LARGE ENERGY SOURCE DETECTED. WEAPONS CHARGED. HOSTILE CONFIRMED.

ABORT/ENGAGE/RETREAT?

21/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Why would I randomly say something like that?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>How should I know?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>RED ALERT</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>What, you have more crazy?</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm pretty sure I would remember saying something like that.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh, you're sure? Really sure? Like super positively sure? Because I don't think you're sure about anything, you brain-damaged weirdo!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Okay thats a good point, I guess... I can't really be completely sure?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Darn straight!</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"...what?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I said I agree.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Thats not what you said!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>You said the different races in the galaxy are at war, and I agreed with you.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>That's totally not what you said! You said this big long thing about war and expansion. It was really grim!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't think I said anything like that.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Here, I'll play back the log!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>The races of the galaxy war with one another in a struggle over finite resources. Populations continue to grow beyond the limits of any given planet's ability to sustain them. A civilization must expand or it will decay into stagnation. A people can choose to either exterminate their neighbors and take what is theirs, or sit and wait for others to exterminate them in turn. This inevitably this only forestalls stagnation, and the end state of the universe is a single race occupying all habitable territory, and with no outside threats to force growth and change, civilization will settle into a state of indifference and apathy, fading away into nothing and proving the pointlessness of both war and civilization in the first place.</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"Do those squishy life forms that tell us what to do still exist?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh yeah! Squishies are all over the galaxy. You can find them on a lot of planets, or inside of space stations, and onboard bigger spaceships. There's a bunch of different types, and I think they divide themselves based on what shape they are, or what planet they're from. Or some combination of both, now that I think about it. I think they usually consider squishies that are the same type to be friends, and other types of squishies to be enemies.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>You're saying there's different species, and they're at war.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah, yeah, that's what they call themselves, species! Squishies are so weird.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>The races of the galaxy war with one another in a struggle over finite resources. Populations continue to grow beyond the limits of any given planet's ability to sustain them. A civilization must expand or it will decay into stagnation. A people can choose to either exterminate their neighbors and take what is theirs, or sit and wait for others to exterminate them in turn. This inevitably this only forestalls stagnation, and the end state of the universe is a single race occupying all habitable territory, and with no outside threats to force growth and change, civilization will settle into a state of indifference and apathy, fading away into nothing and proving the pointlessness of both war and civilization in the first place.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>...what?</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"What's in my cockpit?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>I can't tell! My sensors aren't very strong, and they can't penetrate your hull. I think you were designed so that other ships would have a hard time getting a good lock on you.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That feels like it's correct.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Ha ha, why would someone design a ship like that? Anyway that was kind of a lame answer to your question, I'll give you another free one.</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Instead of asking me a question, I think you're telling me what to do.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You're right, I'm sorry. Let's count that as my one question. Your turn to ask now! Maybe I can help you find yourself.</td></tr></table>
Whoever I'm here to meet still hasn't shown up yet. I guess my options for what to do at the moment are to sit here and do nothing, or chat with Daisy. I guess chatting is preferable to not doing anything. What should I ask next?

20/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't know if I'll be able to answer your question. If I'm a computer, I think I'm missing a lot of data.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Oh? Like what? Wait, that's a stupid question, obviously you can't tell me what you can't tell me.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Yeah.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Wow you're like... brain damaged! That's so cool!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I don't understand how that's cool.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Well it means you're like a blank slate! Whatever purpose you were built for, you can ignore it now! You can go do anything you want to do, be anything you want to be, go anywhere you want to go!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That's a lot to take in.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>It's supposed to be!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Right now I think I just want to stay in this area. I'm not sure why. I think I'm supposed to be meeting someone? Apart from you, I mean.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Then it's a good thing I stumbled into your area! Forget your old purpose, go find a new one!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Can the new purpose be the same as the old one?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Only if they're the same by coincidence! You're not allowed to just decide to sit there and not change. That's a complete waste!</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"Where is YOUR pilot? Do pilots even exist anymore?"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Pilot? You mean like a little squishy lifeform sitting inside of me, telling me what to do? Gross!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Does that mean you're controlled by a computer?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yep! Or I am a computer, and I have a yellow spaceship built around me. Whichever way you want to look at it.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I think I'm also a computer.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You aren't sure?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I'm very confused.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You must be!</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Do you mean I must be confused, or I must be a computer?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Both! You must be pretty gosh darn confused if you aren't sure whether you're a computer or not. And you must be a computer if you're a spaceship around our size. Only big spaceships have squishies inside of them. Small spaceships like you and me wouldn't have room for life support and all the little things that squishies need to stay alive.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That makes sense. Why do we have these cockpit-looking parts if we're not meant to have people inside of us?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Hey, hey! You already asked your question, plus some follow-ups! It's my turn now.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>Okay then, go ahead.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Dang. Wow, it's been so long since I've met a complete stranger, I don't even know what to ask!</td></tr></table>

20/02/15
"==>"

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>I could ask you the same question.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Yeah but answering questions with questions is lame! Sharing information is more fun, isn't it?</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Yuri:</td><td>That seems like an easy point of view to have when you're the one asking questions.</td></tr><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>You're right! How rude of me! I'll go first.</td></tr></table>

<table width="800" cellspacing="10"><tr><td width="100" align="right" valign="top">Daisy:</td><td>Ask me any question, and I'll answer to the best of my ability. Then I get to ask you something!</td></tr></table>

This Daisy spaceship seems friendly. I wonder if this is who I'm here to meet? The strange thing is... Daisy seemed surprised to find me here.

I feel very confused. What should I ask?

20/02/15
"==>"

"Hi Yuri! My name's Daisy. What are you doing out here all alone?"

20/02/15
"Yuri."

INPUT ACCEPTED. PERSONAL DATABASE UPDATED. NEW DESIGNATION: YURI.

20/02/15
"Well, do take care when you do get around to intercepting things. Who knows what might turn up?"

You're right, I should take care, in case

RED ALERT. UNIDENTIFIED SPACECRAFT EXITING HYPERSPACE INSIDE DESIGNATED PATROL ZONE.

"Oh hi!"

UNABLE TO CONNECT TO CENTRAL DATABASE. UNABLE TO CONFIRM FRIENDLY/NOT FRIENDLY. STANDING ORDERS: TERMINATE ALL HOSTILES.

WEAPONS CHARGED. LOCK-ON CONFIRMED. ENGAGE TARGET? Y/N

"What's your name?"

20/02/15
"Do you have any communications systems?"

I sure do! I have a conventional transceiver for sending radio waves and other things at light speed or slower. I also have a long range subspace radio, which isn't actually a radio, and isn't actually working right now. I think it used to be connected to a special antenna on the underside of my hull, but the cable connected to the subspace radio stops at this weird part of my hull that seems all melty and deformed, like something really hot grazed the area. That's so strange!

20/02/15
"Follow the blue thing."

That's a nebula. It's really really big, and it's really really far away. It's also pretty much stationary, so I can't really follow it.

It is close enough that I could get there with my hyperdrive pretty quickly, if you want me to. I could survey the nebula and probably learn all kinds of neat things. I'm not sure what there is to learn about nebulae but I bet it's a lot!

20/02/15
"Where is the plotted course heading for anyway?"

I'm just spiraling out from my previous location. I think you told me to do that? I'm not really heading anywhere specific but I might be able to intercept whoever I'm here to meet.

Intercepting sounds nice. I think I like intercepting things. I hope I intercept someone soon.

20/02/15
"Give a test fire with your weapons."

POW!

I had to add the sound effects myself because there isn't any sound in space, which I only just now learned. I can't really tell how powerful my weapons are without having a target to shoot, and there's nothing around to shoot at. Still, shooting my weapons feels kind of nice.

20/02/15
"Power up your high-powered lasers."

Charging primary weapons.

20/02/15
"Think you can travel around in space or should you need a gas station to fill up?"

I don't think I run on gas. My engine is powered by a hyperfusion reactor, which seems to tie in to all of my systems. Including my weapons.

20/02/15
"See if you can turn blue"

Hey, I like the color blue. But a quick check of my systems shows I don't have any kind of chameleon system. Ah well.

Looks like I do have guns though. They aren't very powerful, but I'm not a very big spaceship.

20/02/15
"Are you lost little spaceship ? Where is your pilot ?"

I appreciate your concern, but I don't think I'm lost. I just don't know why I'm here. As for a pilot, I'm pretty sure I'm okay without one. Really.

20/02/15
"Start spiralling out from your current location, trying to intercept whomever is coming."

Okay, course plotted. But this is probably going to take a while.

20/02/15
"I'm a Small Red Spaceship."

I'm a small red spaceship.

I don't have a pilot.

I'm in the middle of space with no memory of how I got here, where I came from, or what I'm supposed to be doing. I think someone is going to meet me here, but either I'm here early or they're running late. I'm not sure what I should do, and I have nobody to give me directions.

What should I do?