Oh shit. you're right. Welp. You're out.
???: What're you doin', 8uddy?
Kai: Uh, I... who are you?
???: Heheheh... just hangin' around!
???: Here, let me hop down so you can get a 8etter view of me.
"Kai: Give the tree a lil’ smooch."
YUP THAT SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD IDEA YOU WON'T LET ANYONE TOUCH THIS TREE
NOT ON YOUR WATCH
Wh•what... is... happening...
oh gdo makeit stop no wyou catnt t ake thi san y mor e a h H H H H
"Kai: Use a memory orb."
You pull it out, but as soon as it's in your hands, you don't know what to do.
"Cain: Hug the tree."
Hush now, little tree...
You open up your NAME ABSTRATUS and enter in a name. A small feeling of happiness washes over you, brief but enjoyable. A small memory, as if unlocked from a secret cabinet, frees itself and falls into the ruminating stew of your thoughts.
Your name is CAIN MACBETH. As a result of a childhood misspelling, your friends began calling you KAI. Today is the seventeenth of May, your birthday. Your interests include...
Damnit, you lost it. Well, you'll do what you can with what you have. You feel like it's always been this way.
What to do?
You are molested by several Japanese names. DO YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING JAPANESE PERSON?
... Actually, you're a very generic stick figure, so you suppose it could be an easy misconception. But still, fuck you.
Like, seriously, one more bad name and the NAME ABSTRATUS would have broken. Dick move, honestly. It's not fucking invincible.
You're floating in the midst of an empty space. You begin to question if this is even theoretically possible.
You know what, probably best to let things go. After all, that tree is cut in half and seems thriving.
"???: Examine objects."
Actually, you can do one better. After you INVENTORIZE them, you're able to EXAMINE them.
Oh, it appears your INVENTORY doesn't recognize it. You wonder what they do?
???: Oh... Okay.
???: Well, before I do anything else, I should probably try to recollect information.
You have arrived in a strange land, where a light breeze blows gaily through the air and several objects lie in the grass around you.
G⊙⊙D RIDDANCE, Y⊙U USELESS FUCK. WE DIDN'T WANT Y⊙U ANYWAY.
Wait... what...? That was... vaguely familiar -
"???: Look around."
???: W•who are you?
???: Y⊙ur w⊙rst nightmare.
There's not much, but then again you are standing in complete darkness.
Oh, wait. What the hell is that?
... Well, shit.
Remember what? You just woke up here in a strange place! You don't even remember your name!
You do, however, still have a pounding headache. Ow.
???: Well, I mean, it's easier to see now.
A long, high-pitched, droning sound fills the air.